Why Gossip Hurts Women: Can We Heal this together?
It starts so subtle, doesn’t it?
For years, I didn’t see the damage I was part of—how my words, my silence, or even my thoughts were feeding into something far bigger than me…
Gossip. Judgment. Comparison. It was everywhere growing up—in school hallways, family dinners, even among friends. It wasn’t something you questioned. It was just how we connected, how we bonded. And before I even realised it, I was both the one speaking and the one being spoken about.
It wasn’t until much later, when I became a mother and saw my daughters beginning to fall into the same patterns, that it hit me like a wave.
The little jabs, the subtle dismissals—they were learning what I had learned. And I realised: this wasn’t just their behaviour. This was mine too.
How We All Play a Part
The sisterhood wound runs deep. It’s the belief that we can’t fully trust other women, that we’re in competition, that we have to protect ourselves
from the very people who should be our allies.
I’ve been on both sides of it. I’ve been the one who judged, thinking it would make me feel better, and I’ve been the one judged, feeling the sting of
betrayal. It’s a cycle that’s been passed down for generations, and it thrives on insecurity, fear, and unhealed wounds.
But here’s what I’ve learned: this isn’t our fault. This behaviour isn’t something we’re born with—it’s something we’ve been taught.
And because it’s learned, it can also be unlearned.
The Moment Everything Shifted
One of the hardest but most healing moments for me was looking back and realising the harm I had caused—not just to others, but to myself. Gossip, judgment, and comparison don’t just hurt the person on the receiving end; they hurt the one doing them.
I had to ask myself some hard questions, Being truthful to myself made answering them hard, but they were necessary.
What was I gaining from it?
What was this behaviour saying about me?
What is lacking in my life that is making me put other women down to feel better?
Am I participating in this to be able to bond and feel included in this group ?
What was I afraid of losing if I didn’t join in?
Would I like someone talking about me in this way?
If this woman was here would I tell her this?
Am I just filling up the space with words just to be part of this group?
I realised I was using judgment to protect myself—to deflect attention from my own insecurities, to feel a false sense of connection, to avoid facing my own wounds.
Why did I feel the need to judge another woman? Why do I still fall into this unconsciously in moments of weakness?
Breaking the Cycle
Healing the sisterhood wound doesn’t happen overnight, but it starts with awareness. It starts with choosing connection over separation, even when it feels uncomfortable.
For me, one of the most transformative ways I’ve done this is through sister circles. There’s something so powerful about sitting in a circle with other women—sharing openly, listening without judgment, and holding space for one another.
In these circles, we rewrite the story. We let go of the belief that we’re in competition. We learn to trust, to celebrate each other’s wins, and to hold space for each other’s struggles.
When we heal this wound, everything changes.
I’ve seen in myself and the women in my community:
You stop measuring yourself against others and start celebrating your unique journey.
Relationships with other women become rooted in trust and mutual support, not competition.
When you let go of judgment, you create space to see your own worth clearly.
Releasing judgment and gossip feels like shedding a heavy weight you didn’t realise you were carrying.
When you embrace connection and compassion, you shine from the inside out.
If you're feeling the pull to break this cycle, to connect with women in a way that feels real and supportive, I invite you to join our Radiant Femme Sister Circle in
The Radiant Femme Membership.This isn’t just another gathering—it’s a sacred space where you can let your guard down, share from the heart, and be met with love and understanding. It’s a space to heal the sisterhood wound and rediscover the power of connection.Because when women come together in trust and compassion, we don’t just heal ourselves—we heal generations.
Let’s break the cycle and create something new—together.
Stay Radiant,
Josefina
